Watching Drunk People

First, thank you so much to all of you who helped me get through the scariness earlier this week. I really appreciate it!!! I am doing better, primarily because there hasn’t been any spotting in the last couple days. Yes, I still have cramping, but it comes and goes, and I keep telling myself it’s normal. I have to assume that baby’s still in there and growing…

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Last night, we went out with some friends for St. Patty’s Day. Luckily we went to a Mexican restaurant – no real big celebration there, unlike our normal bar that we hang out in which is crazy on St. Patty’s Day! I had my club soda with lime juice, and watched all of them drink their margaritas. (Can I just tell you how disgusting tequila smells when it’s in everyone’s breath and you have super-sensitive smelling powers and a queasy belly?) It was an interesting group, and it whittled down to some core friends, at which time the drunk talking seriously began. We went home right before the “I love you, man” phase. It was the hubs and me, a couple friend of ours that went through infertility and loss along with their kids (seriously, who brings their 5 and 6 year old kids to the bar at 9:00 at night?), and another guy whose girlfriend is four months pregnant. These people are close to us, so they know all our IVF and loss history. Unfortunately, the worst part about telling people that you’re doing IVF and getting support through the process is they know when to ask if you’re pregnant. And so we have told all the close people in our lives – no hiding for us. But they all know about our losses, and they all know that we’re super nervous. It’s an interesting approach, one that I know a lot of people don’t agree with, but one that works for us.

As the evening – and drinks – progressed and it was just five of us plus the kids running around, it became absurd – and a little sweet and sad. The guy whose girlfriend is pregnant got hassled a ton. He has no plans to even live with the mom after the baby is born, or at least that’s what he says. She already has three kids (!!!) and now after he knocked her up, he doesn’t want to be a father to her other kids – like he’s surprised she has them. He told me, “I don’t mind raising my own kid, but why do I have to be involved with her other kids?” I almost hit him. I have a suspicion that he’s just acting like an ass to get a rise out of us, and will actually step up when it comes down to it, but who knows. But you should have seen my husband – he was giving the guy such a hard time, “Dude, this is your baby’s mother!” I loved it – look at my guy defending the single mom. I was so proud!

The woman who had IVF seven years ago for her first child is an expert on everything fertility, or so she thinks. For the last couple years, she has told me her opinion every step of the way. Which is helpful, but sometimes gets to be a bit much. Last night, she was asking about my hcg levels, and said that I’m definitely having twins. I told her that I had an ultrasound and there was only one sac and one yolk sac and one embryo. She said I was wrong – it could have been hiding. We went back and forth, and drunk girl would not give up. And so I did. Sigh…

But the best part of the night was when the dad of the kids started telling my husband and the guy with the pregnant girlfriend about how awful it is to live with a pregnant woman. “Oh you just wait. Once they get to about 5 or 6 months, they’re going to be bitching and moaning about everything! You would think that the whole world revolves around them!” And what does my husband say? “That’s OK, if we make it to 5 or 6 months, then we’ll be safe. She can complain all she wants. As long as we get to have the baby.” Heart melting…